my hair is exploding every morning

Recently I wake up in the morning and my hair is exploding. I've had a short cut since last year and it's easy to manage, but when I look in the mirror I can't help but wonder why it's happening. Maybe it's because I sleep so deep in my duvet?

For more than three whole years, I never went to the hairdresser and cut it myself when it got a bit long. The main reason for this was that I didn't want to spend the money and time on making myself look good. It felt like a betrayal to my mother, who loved to dress up but could no longer go to the hairdresser.

I know that there is no point in thinking like that, since a year ago I think I finally started to break free of this self-imposed stranglehold. My mind moves slowly, but like a bulb growing in the ground, it seems to be moving steadily in the right direction. It was only this month that I had this thought: Maybe I am about to finish overcoming the wall of the grief work.